There’s no doubt that the past year has brought a pretty dramatic shift in our shopping habits. Malls are empty, retail sales are down, and hundreds of businesses are closing up shop. As a nation, we seemed to have collectively stopped shopping. All at once.
Two years ago I wouldn’t have thought twice about picking up a new sweater or the latest bestseller from Borders. After all, I would reason, it’s not like I went to the mall and spent hundreds of dollars on stuff I didn’t really need. So I’d pick up something here or there and never give it a second thought.
How My Own Shopping Habits Have Changed…
The last year, however, has wrought a dramatic difference in my life as a consumer. I think of it like an awakening that happened slowly, much like the flowers that open up so slowly in the spring.
I gradually began to wake up and realize that my consumerism wasn’t only costing me money, but shopping when I felt like I “deserved” something was also using resources. Every sweater and book I bought had to be replaced on the store shelf, which means another tree, another barrel of oil, or another sheet of plastic had to be used to make a new one for the one I bought.
I’m amazed it took me this long to fully grasp that concept.
Does this mean I buy nothing now? Of course not. But I’ve definitely redefined the difference between a “need” and a “want”.
We’ve Lost The Thrill…
I think what’s important to point out here is that because of our “buy buy buy” mentality, all the special-ness has been drained from these things that used to be “an event”. For instance, when A and I were going out to dinner so much, it wasn’t special. It was just our dinner. And we’d have a hard time picking a place because we were just there last week, or a few days ago.
Going out to dinner was just something to do.
Same thing with clothing. How many of us truly feel like buying a new sweater is a luxury? Probably very few, and I’m including myself here. I never thought buying a new piece of clothing was anything special because I did it all the time.
All the special-ness was gone from these things and events because I felt entitled to them. They were just “things”.
But, not any more.
Necessity Or Luxury?
I know I’m not the only person who has gone through this transformation. MSN Money has an interesting article up today on how Americans as a whole have redefined their needs and wants.
It’s a nifty article/poll where you can vote on what you deem to be a necessity or a luxury, and then see the real time results for each item.
For instance, is a car a necessity or luxury? What about a clothes dryer, a microwave, or your Internet service?
I was surprised and gladdened by the results. For instance, far more people than I would have guessed voted the TV as a luxury, and over 90% of people voted that satellite tv service was a luxury.
There might be hope for us yet.
My Old Necessities…
In the past 18 months, here’s the stuff I used to consider “necessities” that I’ve now given up:
- Our second car (A and I share a car now)
- Cable TV
- Satellite radio
- My cell phone
- Trips to Target
- Magazine subscriptions
- Eating out so much
- Gourmet coffee
- New clothes
- New books
- Meat (we became vegetarians)
- Convenience foods like Eggos and frozen burritos
I know many people will throw their hands up here. After all, if you strip everything away then what is life for? Where’s the good stuff?
My More Frugal Delights…
As my consuming habits has changed, so have my delights. For instance, I used to love going out to eat. Now? There is one restaurant we go to on Saturdays. That’s it. Because that’s the only place we go, our meals there are a real treat. We savor every bite. It’s become something special, when before it was just something to do.
And my cooking at home has changed. Before it used to be a chore (which is why we went out so much). But now? I’m starting to really love trying new recipes. It’s become an adventure. We’re saving money and eating healthier by cooking at home.
But, there are some things I won’t give up, and those things are:
- My monthly gym membership
- Red wine
- High speed Internet service
- My favorite fancy cheese
- Organic dog food
Everything else is negotiable.
Where I Found A Middle Ground
There are some things that we haven’t given up entirely, but we’ve simply found a more frugal way to do them.
Travel- A and I both love to travel. But staying in hotels (and finding ones that take dogs) is expensive. Our frugal fix? Camping.
Red Wine- I’ve always bought the frugal bottles (our favorite is Banrock Station Shiraz: $5 per bottle). But green glass can’t be recycled here, and I always had to save the bottles and give them away. My frugal fix?I buy boxed wine now. It’s $10 (sale price, $13 regular price) per box, which is equivalent to 4 bottles of wine ($2.50 per bottle). And, I can recycle both the cardboard and the plastic bladder on the inside.
Movies- We used to rent moves through our cable tv service. Each one cost $4.99. My frugal fix? I joined Netflix. I pay $9 per month, and get one movie at a time. We usually watch 1 or 2 per week.
Books- I live within walking distance of an amazing library. I use it now.
Things Are Simple, and I Love It
It’s funny but all the stuff I’ve cut out of my life, I don’t miss for a moment.
Things like dinners out or occasional lattes from our local coffee shop have become more important because they truly feel special now. And I think that’s great! The less we have, the fuller my life feels. I don’t feel deprived at all. Rather, I feel like I’m coming to understand better the slow motions that move my life, and what really makes me happy.
What Are Your Necessities and Luxuries?
The MSN Money article, and this interesting one from Bankrate.com, got me thinking about this whole issue this morning, and now I’m curious. What have you given up lately that you used to consider a “necessity”? What luxuries are you refusing to go without?
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I have a similar list of things I can’t go without:
~A gym membership
~yummy cheese
~high speed internet
~a cell phone
~and a camera. I’m going to be purchasing one in the next few days.
Great post!
…or the best cheap travel option ever: http://www.couchsurfing.com =) meet people & surf & skip the chain hotel!
RowdyKittens,
That’s awesome; your list IS almost just like mine!
Heidi,
Thanks SO much for sending along that link! I checked it out and am so excited! I might have to write a post about that site. I might end up using it myself! A and I are wanting to go to the Olympic Peninsula in WA this summer, and we’re trying to figure out how to do it with no hotels. That might be the ticket!
Hi Heather, I’d love to hear more about your experience of going vegetarian–was that recently? Avoiding or eliminating animal products in our diet is, along with limiting private car use, one of the single most important things individuals can do for the environment, and yet it’s frequently glossed over by environmental commentators. I wonder if dietary changes can just feel too difficult.
I suppose since meat is so expensive it must have also had a positive financial effect. Looking forward to hearing more!
Hi Michele,
Going vegetarian is one of the best things we’ve ever done. We stopped eating meat 8-9 months ago. We happened across a video that PETA put out on what conditions are really like for the animals we’re consuming, and it was the most horrifying thing I’d ever seen.
After that, we couldn’t bear to be a part of that problem any longer. So for us, it began as a moral choice. After I began to do more research I learned just how bad these large scale farms are on their local environment. So that was another major incentive.
In the spirit of full disclosure, I should add that we do eat fish once per week. I suppose that technically makes us “flexi-terians”. We do this because A gets quite ill from several different beans (although not all of them!) and we found out that eating tofu every night can have a negative on our bodies too. Because we live in a rural area, we don’t have access to some of the great options that you can find at, say, Whole Foods Market. So, our dinner options got pretty limited pretty fast.
Our goal is get more adept in the kitchen and explore our options so we don’t feel the need to eat fish any more. And I’m happy to say we’re getting there! I’m learning how to make the “safe” beans in a wider variety of ways (thank you, Thai and Indian cuisines…).
Our grocery bill has definitely gone down since we went veg. We weren’t heavy meat eaters before, but I did have an addiction to those grocery store Rotisserie chickens- the smell alone would turn me into a zombie and I’d have to buy one. That was $6-$7 each time.
It’s definitely been a challenge! When we first stopped eating meat both of us went through a phase where we almost felt ill. We had no energy at all, were kind of grumpy, listless…and it was only because we weren’t getting all the nutrients we needed. In hindsight, if I did it again I think I’d make a slower transition to get used to vegetarian cooking. We went cold-turkey, no pun intended, and weren’t prepared for being vegetarians full time.
Whew, sorry that’s so long! Perhaps I should write a post about this…I’ve thought about it, but wasn’t sure if people would be interested.
Thanks so much for writing in!
look up “heidiface” and I’ll add you as a friend =)
CS is a mostly common-sense type deal, don’t crash with people who are sketchy… but do take a look and see if there’s a regional list for the area you’re going, it might be more effective than just contacting one person who may not be in town. And if you need ideas for packing light, I’m a full of ‘em. Backpacking across Europe for 2 months with only one smallish backpack = packing *light*
Hint: travel-size deodorant stone, menstrual cup & cloth liners, no bras* (if you MUST, 2), no shaving, shampoo bar* & mini-soap in zip-locks…. nothing should melt in heat, nothing should leak when crunched, and most importantly, nothing should be frivolous!
Things I’ve given up of recent:
Leaving my computer on 24/7
Putting food waste into the trash (I compost)
My dryer
Commerical cleaning products
Plastic bags
Starbucks
Dishwaster detergent with phosphates
Paper napkins
Can’t go without…
So far, my gym/pool membership
High speed Internet service
Great post!
Kate,
That’s a great list!
It’s funny that many of us are refusing to live without the same things (mainly gym membership and high speed internet). I should add paper towels to my list too, forgot about that one.
Thanks so much for writing in!
I think it would be great if you wrote a post about it! I’m at least interested
. My husband was vegetarian when I met him, relapsed, and then went veg again, which caused me to cut down. Though, like you, we didn’t have a meat-heavy diet. At the time I worked for an organic foods company, where I could get great local, organic meat and fish really cheaply (and sometimes free…hard to say no!), so I didn’t go vegetarian until a year after his transition when we’d moved away. I think having that year of very little meat helped a lot. Neither of us had any health issues, but I’ve found it difficult to break the habits of a lifetime of meat consumption–the rotisserie chickens still smell good to me (and, yes, I occasionally indulge in a bite of meat or fish when traveling or visiting friends). I’ve also found that cooking a vegetarian meal can requires a different approach (not just: which vegetables should I have on the side of this slab of meat?), which takes some adjustment.
Anyway, I’d love to read more if you feel like writing a post on it. I think a lot of people go cold-turkey (haha!) like you, and give up quickly because of the difficulties. Your experience, with its positive ending, could prove enlightening.